Youth ministry in your church primarily happens because of your leadership. You choose the youth ministry resources, you cast the vision for the ministry, you plan the events, etc.  But if your ministry is truly going to be as powerful and effective as it can be, you cannot be the only leader. Not only because you will burn out and not last long in this field but also because you cannot do everything. I know this is a tough pill to swallow for many of us. I know it was for me at least. But we are not Superman or Wonder Woman.  We need the help and support of others because there is much work to be done if we are going to truly impact our communities and this generation specifically.  So I want to share a few things with you that I think you need to consider as you look at the leadership of your ministry and whether you are forming a team or trying to do things on your own.

1. Volunteers- You need a good core group of volunteers. This benefits you, your students, but also your volunteers. Because your volunteers can begin to feel overwhelmed just like you can, but since they are not getting paid it does not take as much for them to want to leave.  Now you cannot just choose anyone though just so you can have a massive army of volunteers. You need to do a background check and have some sort of application process so you can get to know them but also know where there best fit may be. This does not have to be a super grueling process but a little vetting is a good idea.  But in this do not be too picky. I think sometimes we get a picture in our minds of what a leader should be and that is not necessarily God's picture.  So keep an open mind because sometimes what I consider to be the most awkward people end up being the best leaders.  The last thing I will say about your volunteers is that you need to empower them to lead. You need to cast the vision for them that their small group or their portion of the ministry is theirs and they need to run with it. They need to invest in their students with all their hearts and follow God's leading for them. Yes you still have a hand on things but this will lighten their load, make them better leaders because they are more invested, and make them want to stick around longer because they have a purpose to fulfill.

2. Students- Your students cannot be in your ministry just to watch a show. You need to give them opportunities to serve and lead in your ministry and in the church as a whole. This way they get a taste of leadership and serving God and like your volunteers have a more of a reason to stick around.  But you also need to equip and empower them to be leaders in their neighborhoods, on their campuses, and sometimes in their homes.  Because they have a work that God is calling them to do at this point in their lives and you need to help them find that work, so that not only their generation gets reached but they also become the leaders who can work to reach the next generation. 

3. Parents- I will not say too much on this because often the parents of your students are your volunteers.  But for those who are not, and even for those who are I suppose, you need to encourage them to be leaders in their homes and neighborhoods spiritually. Because things just work out best when they are filling these roles. But also for those who are not full time volunteers in your ministry, look for ways to incorporate them from time to time and listen to them and draw from the wisdom that many of them have.  Let them that your desire is to work with them as a team to help their child grow spiritually instead of you just doing it all on your own.

4. Discipleship- I could just say train your leaders but I feel it goes deeper than that. We are called to make disciples not just offer good training. And while training meetings are a part of this where you help your leaders learn how to counsel and better run their small groups, I believe we need to see our role more as building disciples. Because at the end of the day our goal in developing leaders is to help our students, volunteers, and parents grow in their relationship with Christ so that they can turn around and reach others and lead them to do the same. This is the essence of discipleship and should be at the forefront of our minds at all times. So know two things. This idea of building leaders does not happen. It is an active role you must play in the lives of your students, volunteers, and parents. And second, think of it as more than just filling holes in your ministry and community. Raise the bar and think of it as discipleship. 

I cannot begin to tell you the difference it will make in your ministry if you have a strong core of leaders.  It not only makes your life a little easier but more importantly it dramatically increases the impact of your ministry. If you do not have a team of leaders in place you need to make this priority number one. If you do, then keep up the good work and let others know how to do the same. 

Youth ministry as a whole, and the  youth ministry resources you use specifically, should be Biblically centered and motivated.  Because if our students are going to survive in the world that we live in they will need a good foundation of truth. This principle may seem obvious to many of us but I think it is important to repeat. Because far too often we get distracted by trying to be fun or be the coolest ministry in town and forget that we should instead be making sure that students are growing in their faith.  Yes we have fun along the way and we play all the games, but in the end of the goal is to have students have a sound understanding of their faith and how to live it out. I think we can do this in three ways.

1. Study the Bible with your students.- You need to have specific times in your ministry where your students dig into the word of God with you or a leader. As part of this you can use a curriculum that you know to be biblically sound or you can just study scripture without a curriculum to guide you. But you need to make sure that your students are digging into the word in your ministry so that you know they are getting fed at least once a week spiritually and so that they can clearly see how important studying the Bible is.

2. Hold them accountable to study the Bible on their own.- Once a week Bible study is helpful but is not enough. Your students need to be in the word everyday.  So you and your leaders need to hold them accountable to do so. This could be simply asking them or you could shoot them a text message or wall post to remind them. You could even give them a challenge to accomplish in study during the week that helps them have something to report back to you. But regardless, make sure that you are seeing to it that your students are in the word throughout the week.

3. Have them live out what they read.- I grew up in church most of my life but never read in James that we are to be doers of the word and not just hearers until I was 19 years old. This was a huge light bulb moment for me. Not only that, but once I started to live my faith out the Bible became more clear to me, it was more exciting to study, and I never wanted to turn to anything else again.  You need to not only challenge students to live out what they read in their daily lives but also give them specific opportunities to do so. This way scripture comes alive to them and they take ownership of their faith.

The Bible is our guide for life so you need to make sure it is a huge part of your youth ministry. Whether it is in specific times of study or just in playing games, always look for ways to share truth with students from the Bible that can change their lives. 

Youth ministry, from the youth ministry resources you use to the events that you plan, should be centered around discipleship. Okay maybe not specifically discipling a student, but at least at the forefront of your mind should always be, "How does what I am doing push a student towards their next step in coming to Christ and being discipled?"  Or for your students who are already being discipled, "How do I push them towards their next step of discipling someone else?"  In order for this to happen I think there are a few things we can focus on in whatever we are doing to make sure that building disciples is at the core of your ministry.

1.  Make discipleship a priority.- This goes beyond just being focused on it and asking yourself the questions I mentioned. This is about also making sure that students have plenty of opportunities to be discipled through small group opportunities and doing life together. This is about making sure that you have enough leaders and students ready to disciple others so that every time someone comes to Christ they can be partnered up to do life with someone.  This is about making sure that as a leader or a student pastor you are constantly communicating the importance of discipleship and what that looks like so that your students know what they should be doing and where they should be going.  We cannot just be passively letting students walk in and out of doors. We must be intentionally working towards helping each student find their next step in the discipleship process.

2. Be relational.- I firmly believe that discipleship is about doing life together. So you need to make sure that your youth ministry is about students building relationships with each other and with a leader. This way they can do life together and discipleship can happen naturally. Because this is the example that Jesus set for us and we must follow it.  So in everything you do look for ways to make sure that this provides an opportunity for students to create and deepen the connections they have with those around them.

3. Put the Gospel in everything. - I came to Christ at camp.  A friend of mine came to Christ on a ski trip. We have had students get come to a life changing relationship in Christ on mission trips. You just never know when those moments might happen and can never assume that "No one could get saved at this event," or that "Everyone here already knows Christ."  I am not saying that you have to share the Gospel from a stage all the time but just make sure that you make the Gospel a part of all you do, even if you are just throwing wet dog food at each other(yeah we did that one time).  This not only gives students every opportunity to come to Christ and be discipled but also models for your students the importance of sharing the Gospel and how to go about doing that in their lives.

Again at the end of the day are goal is to build disciples and that should be the priority in all we do. So I ask you now. What are you doing to build disciples in your ministry? 

Youth ministry has come a long way as have the youth ministry resources that we as student pastors use.  One of the more recent developments in these resources are youth ministry apps. At first, I did not pay much attention to mobile application.  I figured that they were just a passing fad and that they did not serve much purpose in ministry.  But more and more I have realized that not only are they not a passing fad, but the right app in the right situation can save me a lot of time and finances. In case you have not yet begun implementing apps in your ministry I want to share a few reasons as to why I believe they are beneficial as well as mentioning a few apps that we have developed that I believe can be helpful to you as a student pastor.

1. Affordable.- None of us have an unlimited amount of financial resources. If you do then we should hang out more often.  But even if our resources were unlimited we still need to be wise stewards of what God has given to us. I have found apps to be a huge help in this process. Now, I can find things like devotionals, commentaries, Bible studies, or just ministry ideas for 99 cents or sometimes even free.  So not only can I now get what I need but also can be freed up to use my budget on other important items. This also is helpful when working with students because you can suggest and provide resources to them that fit into their often tight or nonexistent budgets as well. 

2. Easily accessible.- Instead of driving to the bookstore or scouring through a catalog you can immediately find what you need in your pocket.  This is helpful to you, your leaders, and your students.  This is especially helpful because if you suggest a resource that you want your students to access, they do not have to leave with you just hoping that they do. You can stand right next to them and make sure that they download it. 

3. Less likely to be lost.-  This has been my favorite thing because I lose things all the time and then have to purchase it again.  But I rarely lose my phone. And if I do I replace it and everything on it is backed up somewhere. So no more finding resources over and over again. Not to mention that I can keep things more organized. This has also been great with our students and leaders. Because it seemed like every week we were printing the same binders and devotional books. But once we started putting things into mobile applications things were not being lost anymore and we were saving time and money as well.

These are just a few of the benefits that apps can have for your youth ministry.  But in order to be of full service I want to share with you some apps that we have developed that we have found to be helpful to other student pastors, but also in our ministry as well. 

1. Youth Ministry Ideas- We have spent years collecting ideas to help us do our jobs more effectively. Then we realized that other student pastors probably were in the same boat that we were. We also kept making binders for our leaders crammed full of things they could do with their small groups.  And then we would have to make those binders multiple times during the year for various reasons. Well we finally decided to bundle all of those ideas into an app for you and your leaders.  No more binders and no more searching for ideas. This app has 100 ice breaker questions, 100 mission project ideas, 100 ideas for fellowship, and over 50 suggestions for discipleship, all for $.99.

2. Youth Ministry Games-  One of the top questions we get is, "Do you know of any games? "  Well we do and we have included 100 of our favorite games categorized into indoor and outdoor games. We also have included a list of supplies needed, mess level indicators, and game instructions. And you get all this for only $.99.

3. Custom Apps- Our church, like your church possibly, has had an app for a while. After a while though we found two problems with our church's app and others like it. For one it did not promote the student ministry very much. The other problem is that much of it was just about promoting the church instead of equipping our people with a tool they could use to go out and do ministry.  So we decided to change that. We created a custom app for our student ministry loaded with a Gospel tract, devotional, discipleship curriculum, life issues scripture guide, journal, Bible, and other features. It has been great to see our leaders use it to disciple our students as well as our students use it to reach their friends for Christ. We want you to have that same opportunity.  So we are offering to design a custom app for your ministry that meets your wishes and specifications. 

4. What /is A Disciple?- - Over 860,000 people a month are asking this question online so we set out to answer it. We did this by writing a discipleship curriculum designed specifically to teach people what a disciple is.  Then we realized that now we can not just think about writing great curriculum but also the best ways to get that curriculum into the hands of students.  So we bundled the curriculum into an app so they can be discipled and turn around and disciple others. 

5. Youth Ministry Resources- We know that one of the best resources we have as student pastors is each other. So we have created our free app so you can stay better connected with not only our resources but also the free training and support that we want to offer you.  We believe that this app will be of great benefit and encouragement to you and hope you will download it and become a part of the Youth Ministry Resources community. 

Youth ministry, as we have seen over the past few days is not something that is just about the youth ministry resources you use, nor is it just about what happens inside of the walls of your church.  But it also must be about you getting out into the community around you and the world as a whole to do ministry and reach those who do not yet know Christ. We also have seen that it cannot just be you doing this work but it must also be your students and your leaders.  And one of the biggest places where this must happen is in the schools.  Now, as I right this I know that for many of you your blood begins to boil over debates about church and state or whether public school, private school, charter school, or home school is the best option. But that is not what this is about. Because while there is a time and place for those discussions, what is most important is for us to realize that there are lost students out there who need to be reached and they spend most of their time in a school. Not to mention that the school and its events are the centers of most communities. Therefore we must have a presence there and be figuring out ways to reach students where they are.  So today, I do not want to have a debate but instead, give you some ideas about how you can get out their and reach the school campuses in your area. 

1. Be a professional.- As you approach a school make sure you dress and act professionally. This is not the time to try and be hip, funny or cool. Because at the end of the day a school is a business, or at least they try to run themselves like one. So if you are trying to get a presence on a campus you need to respect that and act professionally. This is especially true if you are going to go to campus lunches. While this is not always the most effective form of ministry anymore, if you do choose to visit your students on campus make sure you dress appropriately, follow their guidelines, and act respectfully. Do not start a food fight, disturb the peace, or mess with people's food, regardless of how much attention you might get for it or how funny you think it is.

2. Serve the school.- This does not need to be all about you getting attention or being the center of things. If that opportunity comes take it, but the best first step, and honestly the best attitude to have in general, is to serve the school.  One way to do this is to call the principal or contact the athletic or band booster clubs, and see what help is needed. Then you provide the resources and volunteers that are needed.  Or maybe you come up with an idea of something that might be a huge help, like hosting extra after school tutoring and providing pizza. Then if they like your idea you run it and take advantage of an incredible new and outside the box ministry opportunity. 

3. Equip and unleash your students.- There are many ways to reach a school campus, but if you want to see massive change and revival break out, you will have to equip and unleash your students to reach their campuses.  Because not only will it mean more when a student reaches out to one of their lost peers, but there is also much work to be done. So how much more effective would our ministries be if we sent an army of people out to do ministry in a place where they already have relationships and influence and see those people for 8 hours a day, five days a week?  I am telling you, if you want to see change in your schools and your communities send out your students. And with that, pray for them, train them, encourage them, cast the vision for them, listen to their hurts, needs and ideas along the way, partner with teachers on campuses who can support them, and equip them with the resources they need along the way. Honestly, the best resource they have is sharing their life and the truth of scripture with others. But sometimes other tools can come in handy. For example, our custom youth ministry app was designed with this specific purpose in mind. To give students a tools so they can be discipled and easily turn around and reach their campuses and disciple their friends.  But whatever it is you use, just make sure that sending your students out to do ministry is a priority. 

Please hear me. I understand that as I write this we all face different struggles when it comes to school. For some of you most of your deacon board and Sunday School teachers are coaches, teachers, principals, or maybe even on the school board. And for you doing ministry in a school is no problem. For others of you the school has completely shunned the church and so it is more of a battle for you and more of a risk for your students. But regardless of where you are, God has given us the same calling, to reach this generation for Him and to equip and empower our students to do this work as well. Therefore we must step up and face all challenges to make sure that this work is completed and a big part of this is reaching campuses.  Hopefully these tips will help you in this process, and if you have any there ideas about how those of us in youth ministry can reach to work campuses please feel free to share. 

Every Kid Matters,

Jamie Starrett

Youth ministry cannot just be about what is going on in your church but also must be about equipping your students and leaders with youth ministry resources so that they can go out reach the community around them. Not just so they can bring them back into your ministry, while that is part of this, but also so they can meet the needs of people right where they are.  This blend is so important because Jesus has called us to "go.'  This means that we must go outside of the walls of our churches and not just wait for them to come to us. But the full statement is to "go and make disciples."  Therefore we must also find ways to bring people in who we reach so they can become part of a loving community and be discipled.  I want to take a few moments though to give you some tips on how to do outreach.  Not from some high and mighty position where I think that I have it all figured out, because I do not. But instead from a place of wanting to share with you some things that I have learned over the years that helped me transform how I do outreach and also helped me make sure that I was not doing more harm than good.

1. Student driven.- Any outreach you do needs to be student driven. First of all, it needs to be done by your students or at least they need to play a major role in what is going on. Our ministries can no longer be about telling students to bring their friends to come and see our show.  Therefore you must equip your students to go out and reach their friends in their communities and on their campuses.  You need to train them in how to share the Gospel and how to minister to the whole person.  And then you need to make sure that you love and support them when the road gets hard. But also, if you are doing an outreach on your church campus, let students help plan and run the event. Because the other part of being student driven is that you need to make sure that the event you plan matches the culture of the community you live in and the needs that it has. And who better to help you with that than the students who live in it every day. 

2. Mix it up.- I do think you should have a blend of events on your church property that are geared towards community outreach and also sending your students out into the community itself. Because again, at the end of the day the goal is to help students experience life change so they can be discipled and become life changers. And a big part of this is them being a part of the church.  Plus, the community around you needs to know the church is there and that the church cares about them.  So yes, I do think from time to time you should do events like back to school bashes, basketball tournaments, cookouts, game nights. etc. But remember, even with those it still should all be student driven and about your students connecting with other students who come. 

3. Gospel centered.- I have said this several times and want to say it again.  Everything we should do should come down to us finding a way to eventually share the Gospel with others. So if your students are going and doing outreach outside of the walls of the church, make sure they are trained in how to share their faith with others. And if you are doing an event inside the church, make sure that the Gospel is part of your event in some way, be it from the stage or in personal conversations. 

These are just a few of my thoughts on outreach. I would love to hear from you though. What are you doing to reach out to your community and to equip your students to be prepared for those opportunities?

Youth ministry is all about bringing students to a life changing relationship with Christ and then helping them live out that relationship in such a way that others experience life change as well. And one of the great youth ministry resources you have at your disposal to do this are youth ministry events. But there are a few things that we as student pastors must consider when we are planning and implementing events so that we make sure that they are not only successful but also that they serve a purpose. 

1.     Don’t do an event just because___________ - You could fill in the blanks a lot of different ways here. You could put “because someone told you to.” Or you might put “because you always have.” Or quite possibly for some of you it is “because there is an open weekend on the calendar so obviously you need to add something in.”  These all could be valid reasons to do things at time but they are not always the best reasons for you to have to do an event.  So make sure that an event is really necessary before you begin to put the effort and resources in that it will take to pull your event off. Because while often times you may get some results and rewards from this undertaking there may be other better ways to get those same results and rewards that will cost a lot less time and money. 

2.     Make sure your event fills a need. – This gets into more of when you actually choose to have an event.  You need to think through the culture of the place where you currently minister and the needs of the students there. Then make sure that your event meets those needs.  For example, all students want to feel connected and that they belong and they desperately need that. So you want to make sure that your event is designed in such a way that need met.  Now these needs might also be a community need and not just individual needs. For example, maybe there are many students who cannot afford school supplies. So maybe you throw a back to school bash and as part of that every student gets a backpack full of supplies.  Or maybe no one in your community is throwing an after graduation party that gives students a safe and sober place to hang out on graduation night. Why couldn’t your church step in and provide that for the community?  These are just a few examples but as you plan your event you need to make sure think carefully to what needs you are meeting for your students through this event and then make sure that everything you plan works towards that purpose.

3.     Share the Gospel. -  I do not care if this is a one night, one weekend, or one week event, you need to make sure that the Gospel is a part of every event. Whether you share it from a stage or just have your students out making connections and sharing the Gospel individually, you to make sure that people have an opportunity to experience life change in Jesus Christ. Because if the Gospel is not at the center of what we are doing then it has no part in our ministries. 

Again, events are a great tool at times to reach students for not Christ, but not always something that we have to do. Also, these are just some guidelines as you consider or plan an event.  Hopefully they will help guide you and make your future events more successful and something that has a great impact on the community around you.  And as always, if you need specific help in what sort of events you could throw and how to plan them, please feel free to contact us. We would love to partner with you and make sure you have what you need to make your upcoming youth ministry events a huge success. 

Youth ministry has many facets to it, from youth ministry resources, to games, to events. But youth ministry missions may be one of the most important facets of all. This is because not only are we called to go out on mission and reach the world around us, but also because I have found these are the moments where students truly begin to understand scripture, grow in their faith, and take ownership of that faith.  It is always amazing to me the light bulbs that go off and the discussions that come about when a student goes out and lives out what they have learned in a real world context. That is why I want to take a moment today to talk about a few different categories of missions and then give you a few youth ministry ideas along the way to help you come up with some mission projects you can use in your church.

1.     Local Missions- Every student ministry needs to be serving their community.  The community around them needs to see that the church loves them, cares for them, and does not just see them as a mark that they can add to their attendance rosters.  This is especially true in many communities where they church has a bad name and is now seen as irrelevant.  There are many ways to turn the tide of this bad perception but I have found the best to be loving those around you. Because after all, we cannot take the principle that they don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care and only apply it to our own lives. It really must apply to our churches as a whole.  And besides, remember that Jesus called us to reach Jerusalem first anyways. So if we are not doing anything in our community all year what is the point in going overseas or doing anything else? There are many things you can do but here are a few ideas to get you started.

·      Homeless Shelter- If you have a homeless shelter of some kind in your community you could take your students down to hang out, sort donated items, or serve food. Just know that many shelters have strict volunteer policies so you will want to call ahead and see if they allow teens and what they will let your teens do.

·      Nursing home- Having had family members in nursing homes I know how much that visitors mean to them.  You could do something like run a BINGO game, give the ladies manicures, have a church service, or just sit and listen.

·      Neighborhood/Park cleanup- This is a real quiet but powerful way to impact your community.  You could just go out to a park as a ministry and clean up and even provide lunch or bottled waters to others while you are there, or you could just go to a neighborhood near your church and go door to door to see if anyone needs any help.

·      Campus- You could call the local principle and see if there is any way that your students and leaders can serve the school. Sometimes they need free help at events and sometimes it is just simply creating care packages for teachers.

·      Care packages for the homeless- You could create seasonal care packages for the homeless (i.e. Gloves and blankets in winter).Then, you actually take your students out to hand out these care packages.  It is incredible time for you and your students and much learning takes place.  We have done this with our students and have had great conversations with others and our students always want to go back.

2.     Global missions- We are called to go to the end of the Earth so we must do that. I encourage you to challenge your students to take an overseas mission trip before they graduate, and then make sure to provide them that opportunity. I cannot tell your where to go but here are some ideas of what to do once you find a location.

·      VBS- You could run a vacation bible school or backyard bible club for teens and children in the community. It makes a great opportunity for your students to develop leadership and share the Gospel.

·      Sports camp- This is and easy way to build relationships and connections that allow you to share the Gospel.  Just make sure you choose an appropriate sport that you can play and the culture is interested in learning. 

·      Relationship building- I have not been, but I hear in places like Germany people love to just sit around and talk. So if you could find a place like that you could just go to markets and coffee shops and just build relationships and share the Gospel all week. (You could do this at home as well.)

·      English classes- Many places want to learn English or at least want to practice their English so you might be able to go somewhere to provide this service. 

·      Church partnership- I suggest making this your starting point anyways, but find a church overseas that you can partner with and be a part of supporting what they are doing in the community already.

3.     Ongoing Missions- This is not so much a category as a soap box. Missions must be an ongoing thing in your youth ministry.  This way students do not just take an occasional trip to appease their consciences but they instead realize that need is around them all the time and they must live a lifestyle of missions.  This is why I suggest forming partnerships and coming up with many ways to get out and do local missions. Plus, when you do missions this way you do more to help instead of just coming in like a rushing wind for a week or two and leaving, never to be heard from again. This often does more harm to communities than good. So make sure that missions, from praying to giving to going, are always a part of your ministry.

Hopefully this gives you some ideas to get the ball rolling about how you can reach and serve the world around you. Also, feel free to let us know how you are doing missions in your youth ministry so we can continue to support each other in community as we take the Gospels to the ends of the Earth.

Youth ministry, if done properly, takes you down a hard road. "But wait a second. You keep telling me all these youth ministry resources are going to make my life easier and just a couple of days of you said youth ministry is not that hard."  You're right. All those things are true. But with all this talk about how to make your live in student ministry easier I do not want there to be any temptation for us to think that we should always be looking for the easier way to do things. This should never be because that is not the way a follower of Christ thinks.  And while we are going to looking specifically today about how this effects us in ministry, please know that these principles apply to us in every area of our lives.

1. Christ called us to the hard road.- Whenever you see Christ calling people He is telling hem to take up their cross and follow Him.  This did not give His listeners a picture of cute jewelry or a fun t-shirt.  They pictured death, and the worst death imaginable at that.  They knew that following Jesus was a hard road and that it would probably cost them their lives. They not only knew it because of these statements but because Jesus specifically called them to the hard road at one point.  We all are familiar with the passage of the narrow and the broad road and how only leads to Heaven. Well guess what?  Those truths that Jesus taught 2,000 years ago still ring true today and still are something that must be applied to our ministries and our lives.  Often times in ministry we will have to make the tough decisions and do the less popular things, but if that is what it takes to be obedient to God's calling them we must do them. 

2. Christ promised us we would have struggles.- Jesus said that in the world we would have troubles. But remember He also said that we should not worry because He had overcome the world.  Jesus knew we would face opposition and trials and He was always very upfront about this.  So when we do we should not be caught off guard. There will be bumps in the road.  We will not be able to keep everyone happy. But do not worry.  Jesus has overcome the world. Plus, I find that often times when someone is mad it me it probably me there is a chance that I am following Jesus pretty closely and they just do not understand.

3. We need to speak these truths to our students.  - These truths are not just for us. They are for our students as well. Not just that they are for our leaders, and our students parents, and our entire church. We need to make sure we speak these truths to them and make sure that they take the hard road as well.  Which makes this a hard road for us as well. Why?  Because our students, and others in our lives, will not necessarily want to hear what we have to say.  But we are not called to be popular or to be their best friend. We are called to be disciples and have been placed in their lives for a reason, to help them experience live change and go out and change the lives of others.  Yes we are to love them. but sometimes love means saying the hard things. 

So please know, yes youth ministry is a hard road at times, but you are not alone. You have Jesus and you have your brothers and sisters who are also on this road.  And we want to be counted as those who are with you so please continue to let us know how we can support and pray for you on this journey.  

Youth ministry has destroyed many families.  Be it the time away looking for youth ministry resources or running events or the heart breaking instances of infidelity, for some reason it seems like every time you turn around you see another student pastors family breaking apart.  This is why as a student pastor, you must make sure that your family is priority. In fact it should be your #2 priority right below your relationship with God. Yes this may mean you have to say no more and make a few people mad, but who cares if everyone is happy if you lose your family?  Now, I do not want to leave you with this thought that I know you understand is important and true without giving you some practical steps in how to make sure that your priorities of family and ministry stay properly in check.

1. Keep God first.- I alluded to this earlier but since it is some important I want to expand upon it more.  God is what makes everything in our lives work. Without Him we are nothing. And the moment we start to turn away from Him everything else starts to fall apart. I can almost guarantee you that if you look at any minister, or anyone at all for that matter, whose family has fallen apart, and they or their spouse had stopped spending time with God at some point along their journey.  This is why you must make sure that you are daily making your relationship with God your number one priority so that you can be better in tune with your spouse. Then from their you can know what decisions you need to make in your ministry. 

2. Set boundaries.- Once you are in tune with your spouse and have a clear understanding of what they desire and expect, you then need to set boundaries in your ministry that align with what you have discussed.  You need to make it clear when you will be in the office and when you will not. You need to clearly communicate how many nights a year you can be away. You need to tell your students at what hour your cell phone is off.  Will there be times when these boundaries get crossed?  Of course there will be. At times in ministry we have to go above and beyond because it is what we are being called to do in that moment. But too often we get pulled away or overstep what should be a boundary for reasons that are unnecessary or could wait until tomorrow.  Maybe it is a teen in crisis because they got dumped and they'll "never love again." It can probably wait until tomorrow.  Maybe it is that event that "we have done since we laid the first bricks of this building." Maybe it is not needed anymore or you do not need to be there the whole time.  Whatever it is, look for those boundaries, set them clearly, and then follow them.  And for those rare occasions where you need to cross them, clearly communicate to your spouse when this is happening and why. 

3. Have accountability. - You need someone in your life that is not only holding you accountable to stick to your boundaries but who is also holding you accountable to stay away from sin. Because none of us is above temptation.  But just because we are tempted does not mean that we have to sin.  We can have a way of escape as scripture teaches us and part of that escape I believe is accountability. You need to find someone you trust that will meet with you regularly and allow you to share your struggles.  Because every time you see another fallen minister you need to realize that they probably did not have accountability in their life. And that could easily be you if you choose to walk through this life alone.  Which brings me to my next point.

4. Get help. - This includes your accountability partner but is about much more than that. If you try to be the only one doing ministry you will eventually burn out and fall apart. You need leaders who are equipped and empowered to do ministry. If possible, find a willing college student who will be an intern for free. If they won't do it for free, squeeze a few pennies out of the candy budget to buy them a burger every week.  It is not that I think an intern is that important, but it is the bigger picture that I believe help is important. Even if you are in a small church, you cannot do this alone.  You cannot be at every event and every crisis. You need leaders and others who can take on some of that load for you at times so you cannot only be with your family more often but can stay in the ministry for the long haul.

5. Make your youth ministry a family.- This is important because honestly this is what students want. They want to feel connected and that they belong somewhere.  And when you are so close that you are a like a family you can be honest with one another and you also want to support one another.  So if you are close with your students you can be honest with them about the fact that while they are important to you your family comes first.  But hopefully, by making your ministry a family, your family can be a part of what is going on in the ministry and the students in your ministry can be a part of what is going on in your family from time to time.  This way you are doing life together so that many of these other things, the help, the accountability,, the boundaries, just naturally take place as you truly become the family of God.

I know this has been a little long but it is so important to me that we keep our families in tact. Because every time a family falls apart it sends a ripple effect throughout our culture, especially when it is someone in the ministry.  I do not want that to be you. I want your family to be strong and hopefully these tips will help.  And please, let us know how you are making sure to keep your family strong in the midst of this thing called youth ministry and let us know how we can help you in that process.